As many of us prepare to send our high school graduates off to college, we are met with both emotional and logistical challenges. Personally, I vacillate between getting weepy, and doing a silent happy dance in my head. This phase of separating is trying on us all, and will only end when she leaves.
It seems the predictable self-centeredness and moodiness of the typical teenager is exacerbated the summer between high school graduation and leaving home. I remember the same phenomenon occurred the summer I was 18, and I’ve read that it is a normal developmental phase. Being argumentative with their parents is a way young adults prepare themselves to break away. In addition, they are in limbo, feeling like an adult who should have all the rights of one, yet living under their parents’ roof. I try not to overreact by remembering this behavior is an unconscious adaptive tool.
Logistically, there have been many tasks to get us to this point. The arduous college search is over. Applications went in and acceptances came back. Roommates have been selected, housing has been secured, meal plans have been chosen and tuition has been paid.
We are down to one final milestone looming before us this summer: Move-In Day.
I try to remember things have changed drastically in the 30 years since I went to college. Back then, we put very little thought into all of this. The day before I left, I went to the linen closet, grabbed a few towels and a set of sheets. My décor was a corkboard provided by the university which I decorated with photos of high school friends.
Today, the process has become a really big deal for most kids. Social media shows of Pinterest-worthy photo spreads of gorgeous dorm rooms with color-coordinated bedding, rugs and drapery. Tiny twinkling lights adorn bedposts and window frames. Framed artwork hangs in a symmetrical design on the walls.
Following is the final list we put together from various sources. We used this as we gathered items from our closets, and then it became our shopping guide. Roommates should split the list for certain items.
Twin-XL sheet set (some roommates will want to choose a theme and/or a color scheme to coordinate)
Pillows
Comforter
Under-the-bed bins
Padded mattress topper
Nightstand
Bedside lamp
Rug
Fan
Mirror
Wall art (tapestry, banner, poster)
Removable hooks to hang décor on walls
Trash can
Bath towel set
Shower caddy
Shower shoes
Room freshener spray
Dry erase board for door
Over-the-door hooks (can be hung on end-of-bed rail)
Refrigerator
Microwave
Dishes, cups, mug
Food
Water bottle
Utensils
Dish soap
Sponge
Dish towels
Cleaning wipes
Swiffer or dust pan set
Laundry detergent and dryer sheets
Tissues
Paper towel
Laundry bag/hamper
Extra seat (padded ottoman/storage box)
First aid kit
Tool kit
Sewing kit
Pepper spray
Hangers
Toiletries
Medications (including over-the-counter)
Surge protector strip
Chargers, cords
Extension cords
Head phones
The good news is that, in this modern era, Amazon is just a click away. Anything we forgot or she needs can be delivered in a day or two. Most importantly, before we drive away, I hope I get a chance to tell my daughter I am proud of her, that I will always be there for her, and that I love her. Just in case the moment never comes, I think I will put it in writing and leave a note where she will come across it after we’re gone.